


Soldiers & Sanity

by Snowstorm345



Category: Xenoblade Chronicles 2 (Video Game)
Genre: F/F, Other, Rex is just a soft boy, he's trying his best
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-19
Updated: 2019-08-19
Packaged: 2020-09-07 04:54:08
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20303776
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snowstorm345/pseuds/Snowstorm345
Summary: Rex has a burning question that needs to be answered.Mòrag has memories that need to be shared.Together, they form a curious bond over duty and service.





	Soldiers & Sanity

“Hey, Mòrag?” A meek voice accompanied by a light tap on the shoulder was enough to shake the Special Inquisitor out of her meditation. Large, golden eyes met her own desert brown as she stood from the ground of Leftheria. They were currently in the Lud Cloudway taking a break, en route to Fonsett Village. 

“Yes, Rex?” She responded lightly, quickly erecting a cold facade to protect the integrity of her position and duty to the Crown. It was quite a confusing situation to be placed in, overlooking the small team’s crimes in return for them to allow her to accompany them along their journey under the guise that she was ‘assessing the Aegis.’ In reality, it was her own curiosity that overtook her as she recalled the hailed legends of the Aegis and the key position that Mor Ardain’s own Emperor had in the outcome of the first Aegis War. 

When she had first encountered the small group, she was blinded by her patriotism to her country. A member of Torna? Unforgivable. The crimes that had been committed under their name were enough to make her blood boil. And to boot, the word from Captain Padraig had made her uneasy about the reports of the Aegis reawakened. He had made it clear that he would rather her remember his name than remember key facts, so it was not until word from her own blade Brighid confirming the facts of the Aegis’s awakening did she order the ship’s captain to proceed at full speed.

Blinded by her goal, she failed to realize the true intents of the Aegis and her Driver until after the battle, reviewing every step which led to her loss. It was not until she locked blades with the boy a second time in her own home country did she witness their affinity first hand. Kind to a fault, the boy and the Aegis had held against herself and Brighid without so much as giving them a scratch. Without Pupunin’s interference, she was sure she would have won at one point, but began doubting herself after the fact. From then on, their recapture of the factory had earned her grudging trust with the boy and the ex-member of Torna. If fighting her previous teammates was any indicator of her true loyalties, her affiliation with the Aegis confirmed it. 

So here she found herself traveling along the brilliant white of the sand that covered every step of the Leftherian Archipelago, and discovering mystical phenomenon unheard of in other continents. And now she was here holding a casual conversation with the Driver of the Aegis. Quite a perplexing situation.

“W-well, you see, I was wondering. You’re trained professionally. Right? Military training and all?” He stammered out, “cause I have this question, and it might seem stupid but it just makes me feel so… so... useless and I don’t want it interfering with Pyra and Mythra’s goals.” 

Raising an eyebrow, she responded. “Oh? And what would this question be?” She was curious, yes, about the question that the Driver of the Aegis deemed worthy for her to answer. Although a Driver, let alone the Driver of the Aegis, he was still a boy unfamiliar to the world in which he stood in. If anything, she was glad that she would be able to answer his questions for she expected her answers to be much more serious than one that Nia or that Nopon could give. 

“Well, it’s about death.” He said quietly. Shuffling his feet, he continued on, “it’s just that every time that I kill something or attack someone, it just feels so wrong. Although it might be necessary to kill a monster, I just feel like I’m going against what I believe in, killing something that still has a chance to live.” He looked up slightly and finished his statement, “and, well, I was just wondering since you’ve probably done this before, do you ever get… used to doing these kinds of things?” He looked equal parts horrified and determined by what he had said, but waited for Mòrag to gather her answer before making too rash a decision. 

Out of all the questions that Mòrag was expecting him to ask, it was definitely not one that she had prepared for. But it only made sense. He was a small boy, forced into a task larger than he could ever believe and he had most likely never fought more than single-minded sea creatures before his divine intervention. She had seen men come back from battles looking no worse for wear physically. She knew that that was no indication of what truly occurred inside the body. Mentally, they were most likely messes. Massacres usually defined the style of Ardanian attacks, she had to sadly admit. Triple or even quadruple the number of men that were actually needed were pitted against threats that were removed quickly and brutally. Usually, it wasn’t the monsters that sent her men into the mentally catatonic state. It was the battles that were frequently increasing when a Urayan patrol came too close to the demilitarized zone of each side in Temperantia. The fear of death, of what would happen if one side were to shoot first. That was what usually sent them in the spiraling abyss of madness.

When it was the monsters, the results of their fear were much, much worse. Sauroses that could take out ten men in one fell swoop, Taos that swept down and grasped men by the belt and flew them off, never to be seen again. Volffs, when in packs, grabbed as many men as possible and dragged them away screaming only to be silenced minutes later. She could see it in all of her men who came back. Some recovered, some did not, and some were found dead from their own self-inflicted wounds. The military was not a forgiving business. It was not for those who were of the faint of heart, and it certainly was not for children. She sighed heavily. Battlefields were for men and women who knew what they were engaging in, cognizant of the consequences should they disobey orders or make one mistake. Children were innocent beings with eyes full of life. Should that life be snuffed out prematurely by death or tainted with the knowledge of death, it was considered a most heinous crime.

“Mòrag? I-I’m sorry if that was too much. I’ll go away, thanks for your time Mòrag.” Stiffly walking away, he was quickly stopped with a gloved hand to the shoulder. Turning around, he locked eyes with Mòrag as she motioned for him to take a seat across from her. Taking a careful seat, he noticed the tension in her shoulders, the uneasiness of her eyes, and the subtle jittering in her leg that she was attempting to quash. “Are you alright, Mòrag?” He was suddenly more concerned with the Special Inquisitor across from him, rather than the answer to the question he was plagued by. 

“I am quite alright, Rex. Just remembering some… unpleasant thoughts regarding your question.” She cleared her throat, “Rex, what you are asking is… a difficult topic.” She paused, looking for the right words to continue. “You know of the effects of war and battle on the mind, correct Rex?” He nodded in affirmation, “well, then you know where this conversation is going.”

Taking a deep breath, Mòrag released her memories of soldiers who had failed to come back ‘whole,’ so to say. “I knew a man, once. He was the perfect picture of an Ardanian soldier. Loyal, strong, top of his class. Always stayed atop his studies and was kind to those around him.” A clouded look glazed over her eyes as she continued, “I loved him, at one point.” Glancing over at Brighid, she responded with a fond look. “I am glad I have her by my side permanently, now. I have no clue what I would have done without her.” Her eyes refocused and hardened. “But he had changed. He became more irritable, disobeyed his superiors. He even attempted to rally and command a rebel group of soldiers to overthrow Mor Ardain. He was eventually discharged, void of all honors.” Inhaling shakily, she continued. “Word was passed around, that an unknown soldier’s body had been found hanging by a noose in the Central Plaza.” Her voice wavered, but her resolve stayed strong. If it were not that fact that she was a hardened veteran of battle, Rex would have given her a hug. Her next sentence was barely at the tone of a whisper, “I already knew who it was before I even saw it.” Focusing her eyes upon Rex, she narrowed her eyes and delivered an ending for her story. “War changes people Rex.” She glanced towards the Aegis, who was now in the form of Mythra, before continuing. “I know you may disagree with my next statement, but understand, I see no use in wasting precious life especially when it comes to one so young as yours.”

Clearing her throat, she delivered a speech as a King would to his people. “I see naught but faults when it comes to the Aegis’s choice of Driver. While I do not disagree that you as their driver has heart and soul, but it is due to that fact that it is potentially the saddest choice of them all. A child as young as you is to be crushed under the responsibility that is the world. Without a proper guide, who is to guide them to their goal?” Her eyes softened when she reached Rex’s. “It saddens me to see that you may become the next soldier whom I see descend into madness. Although I may have joined your group selfishly, I now have a goal in mind as well. You have my word, Rex, that when the opportunity is given to me, I will do everything in my power to keep the light that burns within you bright, and may the Architect strike me down should I fail.”

Adjusting her helmet and rising, she offered a hand to Rex before providing the answer to what he wanted all along. “And to answer your question? No, you will never get used to it, and it does not make you any weaker than you are now. If anything, it makes you stronger recognizing that life deserves a place in this world, no matter what the circumstance.” She gave him a small smile, “and if anything Rex, that makes me enjoy your company that much more.”

**Author's Note:**

> Mòrag and Rex have gotta be my favorite characters to write for together, it's just that in the story Mòrag's sense of duty seems to get in the way. Supportive Mòrag will always have a special place in my heart. Hope you enjoy!


End file.
